To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

Tribe

Why you need a security detail

I hope this hits some of you like it did me. I have a security detail, and I hope you do as well! It may be that you need to rethink who is in yours, and perhaps even add one or more key folks to the team.

You may be thinking, “What is a security detail?” My son even asked about it when he saw me working on this post. According to Wikipedia, a security detail is a “Personal Protection Detail (PPD); a protective team assigned to protect the personal security of someone.” So, who is protecting you? People who “have our back,” and push us and make us better. People who we primarily choose, though often God blesses us with family members who are incredible at ensuring we are covered, protected, confronted, redirected, and gently pushed toward a positive direction. My sister has always had my back full on and what a gift that has been.

So, what are some of the critical areas where this is essential to a successful life? Here are some thoughts…

Your personal physical and mental health… Everything from exercise and fitness to those girl’s nights out that fill your spirit.

Your financial wellness and ability to find freedom in that area… A trusted advisor who comes alongside you and offers clarity around some often complex and private decisions.

Your career and in the workplace… This one is huge. I’ve blogged before about the need to have a champion – a few, if possible – that you know without a doubt will lift you toward great success.

Your spiritual life and your ability to navigate the complexities of life in general… Who do you know that is locked in to their faith and can help you build yours?

If I think through “who has my back,” I can come up with a short list that I know without a doubt want to see me succeed in many areas. I have, however, gone seasons without that “someone” in some of these areas. This is a call to action if you find yourself in that same boat, so to speak.

It takes intention to seek out this type of help. I personally like to have people that are ahead of me in life, or who have experience in an area at a much higher level than I have. These people offer me the opportunity to level up, and they can hold me accountable because of their experience having already walked this path.

Have a crazy-good week. Make it that way.

Add to your tribe if needed, and know that no matter what, most people are good, and the universe wants you to succeed in all that you dream and desire to accomplish!

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Another in the fire

Want to build your confidence this week? Your bravado? Your courage? This truth is absolutely huge! Our church for the past several weeks has had an amazing song on their playlist – “Another in the Fire” (Hillsong United). It is incredible, namely because of the lyrics.

“There’s a grace when the heart is under fire…
Another way when the walls are closing in…
And when I look at the space between where I used to be and this reckoning…
I know I will never be alone.

There was another in the fire standing next to me…
There was another in the waters holding back the seas…”

In Daniel’s powerful story, the king who had thrown three in the fire was shocked to see that not only were there three walking around in the fire, but a fourth person appeared to be with them.

As a woman who believes firmly in God, this story prepares us for a life changing truth. No matter what is going on – the great celebrations and great tragedies – God is indeed with us. Sometimes it is just you and Him quietly praising or battling, and other times I believe He sends just the right person or people to serve that purpose and fill that need. I see it every single day, whether it be friends circling one another in prayer and encouragement, or ensuring someone is celebrated and honored. There are so many examples of this greatness around us.

You are never alone. We have each other… We have stories that help guide us back to truth when we have doubts, which we all experience. Have the best week my friends!

It takes a strong person to be kind

An excerpt from Maria Shriver’s short read, “I’ve been Thinking,” was powerful to me:

“We all want to be treated with kindness, because we are all struggling in some way, shape or form. I had to learn this as an adult, because growing up in a large, competitive, and tough Irish Catholic family, I used to confuse kindness with weakness. When I grew up, I learned differently. I now understand that kindness doesn’t mean weakness. You have to be really strong to be kind…You have to be really mindful … A person may look ‘happy on the outside,’ but who knows what’s happening on the inside.”

Some of the strongest people I know are also the kindest. And many have been through or are going through some crazy-hard life situations. They show up with a hug or inspirational words despite facing great loss and suffering. Knowing that was proof enough for Maria’s message to resonate with me.

I know that God has given me enough grace in some of my own “most difficult life experiences” to allow me to “show up” as kind and generous in my actions despite how I really felt inside. I can’t take credit for this because, like most of humanity, I’m not strong enough on my own. I give thanks for that to both by faith and a strong tribe of friends and family that surround me.

Today, be proud of yourself for showing up kind, in the midst of whatever is going on in your life. The ability to do so reveals great strength. I believe we definitely make the world better by showing kindness in every possible moment we can…especially when it’s the hardest to do so. You know what else is fun? Doing so likely will have the outcome of making us feel happier, which is a pretty cool by-product.

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Who do you need to praise or pray for this week?

Last weekend several alumni of the University of Central Missouri’s Alpha Sigma Alpha chapter got to together back in “the ‘Burg” to celebrate our 100th anniversary. It struck me when I was there that I have been impacted by these ladies for just shy of 30 years… nearly a 1/3 of those being celebrated. Honestly, it’s a bit humbling to look back on your path so far, and see how God has placed just the right people, and just the right experiences in your life. (Notice, I didn’t say perfect, but just right! As in just what I needed at the time.)

I’ve blogged before about a smaller group of these ladies, “my tribe” that I reconnected with three years ago after a couple of decades plus of raising kids, etc. Now, here they are, back in my every day life as if nothing ever changed (except less “big hair,” blue mascara and those 15 young adults we are all raising). Here’s the thing: We are now here for a different purpose I feel in each other’s lives. Although we closed the place down two nights in a row (we divided and conquered) – so we still have a bit of fun – we lift each other up in more powerful ways. We reach out to each other for advice, for prayers, for good energy and lots of love.

We didn’t realize we needed each other at 18 years old. We had no idea where life would take any of us, yet – but God knew exactly what we needed, and He is proving it 30 years later.

As you go into your week, it seems like a great time and season to really praise and be grateful for those people and experiences. Perhaps even taking the time to reach out to a few and just thank them for their presence in your life. Ask them how you can lift them up, pray, or whatever it is that you might do to send out good energy to the universe. I know for sure I always cherish prayers and believe firmly that God hears every single one. (“There is power in persistent prayer.” Micah 7:7)

Have an amazing week. The universe is conspiring for your great success!

Go deep: We need to build our root system

Throwback from 2017- some thoughts as you wrap up your week strong!

If you’ve ever stood under a redwood tree, you know that their height is something magnificent. And yet, the extent of their root system is shockingly not deep at 6-12 feet. So, how do we account for the crazy growth, with many reaching 300 feet tall? (The tallest pine measures in at 268 by comparison.)

“Redwoods create the strength to withstand powerful winds and floods by extending their roots more than 50 feet from the trunk and living in groves where their roots can intertwine.”

Perfect! Another cool illustration for how important going deep in your relationships is to your ability to grow and optimize your gifts. Of course, I love this – and so should you!

“Community” is what allows us to live a joy-filled life. (“Community” is also defined as families, friendship groups, circles, tribes, colleagues… you get my drift.)

To serve well, it is almost required that we are encouraged, held accountable and ultimately pushed toward our best self. For most of human history, this has been a normal part of life, starting out with the earliest Native American tribes and, for my generation, playing kickball in the street until well after the sun went down. Today, many find themselves immersed in technology and other distractions. That seems almost too obvious to state but when the shoe fits… Heck, I don’t even like to get out of my car to go in the bank. God forbid I can’t take care of business on my phone or through a machine.

I like the idea of going deep. I need to work more at this. I’d love to achieve the greatness of a redwood grove… to lock arms together with some amazing people and establish root systems that allow us all to grow and flourish.

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Even in the rain…

On my drive into the neighborhood I often stop and take a photo of the lake. It occurred to me that I do this when it’s beautiful outside and the late-day sun is reflecting off of the water. It often provides some sort of deep relief as I take in the beauty. (I’m a rock solid Pisces who loves the water – from stomping in puddles to my fav, Table Rock Lake… it’s heaven on earth to me.)

As I drove in tonight, the rain drops on my driver side window captured me. Against the dark backdrop of the early spring rain falling – coupled with way-too-cold temperatures (if you ask me) – I immediately thought how beautiful life can be during all seasons. Here’s what I know…

EVEN if rain falls, we innately know that the rain brings forth the glory of spring and hope for warm days ahead.

EVEN if our days are hard, and at times overwhelming, God has provided a team of people around us that not only love and support us, but want to cheer us on and relish in that as their purpose.

EVEN if we don’t understand where God has us or our loved ones, we can know for sure that when the clouds clear out (and if we quiet our souls enough to really listen and observe…) that we are exactly where we were or are supposed to be.

I need to be more present in the rain and in the days of wondering. We all rise together, so I hope today we can commit to remembering that EVEN when we find ourselves in gentle rain, shoulders down, ducking the weather, or in a downright powerhouse rain storm, that we look up and find the beauty. It is definitely there… That’s God’s promise to us all.

Who are you at your best?

An idea I ran across for the new year was to write a three paragraph statement of who I am at my best. Hmm… Although I like to write, I’m not much for these types of exercises, and prefer a simple, bulleted approach. I figure I can be vulnerable a bit in this space, so here is what I know for sure without giving it a lot of thought. (In other words, I’m sure there are a host of things I’m missing.)

I’m at my best when…

  1. My spiritual life is on point and active.
  2. I am disciplined around my health, including fitness and eating mostly right (I have to have queso… anyone else?).
  3. My tribe of family and friends (I include colleagues here) are part of my regular schedule.
  4. My personal tribe of family and friends are thriving and happy.
  5. I am absolutely on my game in my career.
  6. I have MARGIN… margin in time to think, read, write, margin in my finances, margin in pretty much every area…

What about you? Is it worth it to take some time to identify what being your best looks like? I can easily go through the list above and see some areas that I would like to focus more on. Focus meaning intentional (and sometimes hard) work to just MAKE IT HAPPEN. Making it happen can mean sacrifice and saying no – or maybe even saying yes. It might mean that instead of spending a Saturday doing what I need and want, that I invest time with my tribe.

I can also see by looking at the list that some things are in conflict, such as that little tribe example. Margin isn’t easy to come by anyway, and harder if you also know it’s a competing priority. Here’s the thing: sometimes we have to actually think through “What is the best yes?”

In this season, in this moment, what do I need more – margin or time with friends? There isn’t a wrong answer, and we need to remember that. It’s all good as long as you are working toward your BEST LIFE.

Let’s dive right in (to the new year!)

(Rewind! This post is adapted from January 2018.)

I couldn’t resist the picture! I believe we need sunshine and as for winter… I’m praying it’s beauty is deep and it is only here for a bit longer!

Most of you have likely spent time reflecting on 2018,  putting thought into what you’d like to accomplish in 2019.  I have spent some time already, but intend to spend today taking a deep dive into this myself.  This effort always makes me feel like I have a working plan to put in motion.  I have found that it is completely true that writing down your thoughts and goals is a key part of achieving them.  To me, diving in is the only option. Taking action not only feels good, but it drives us forward.

What areas do you need to take action on? So many of your ‘one words‘ were so good and inspiring. How do you plan to make that happen? What does peace look like when it’s played out?  More time alone to reflect? … A deeper prayer life?  Time set aside time each morning?… What does joy look like? More time with friends? Family? Pets… or doing what fills your soul? …  What does release look like? How do I even do that? What do I need to let go of to optimize my life? How much of an impact can I make?….

My 2019 word, WISDOM, brings me to ask myself what areas I need wisdom in? (All is what came to mind.) Who do I need to have in my circle to optimize my life? And on…  (Oh and by the way, I started the Daniel Fast, so no social media for me over the next 21 days! I’ll still share my blog posts, but I won’t be mindlessly scrolling.What a great place for me to start!)

As you dive in, please know that you have a tribe of people supporting, encouraging and praying for you! I truly believe we can all accomplish whatever it is that helps us be our best. Of course that means, serving well – as in, really well!

What “one word” sets you on fire for the best year ever?

I really love this topic. My mind runs amok with the possibilities. Where in the world does God want us to go in 2019? How do we best achieve our personal goals and purpose? How can we show up with excellence at home, in our neighborhood, as a friend, for our community and in our careers?

Now, of course I know “one word” doesn’t capture it all, but what would one thought be that galvanizes and energizes? Is there a specific area in your life that needs a specific focus? Do you need to for example cultivate your relationships? Do you need to have more days of connection and joy? Are you being called to adventure, travel or exploration?

So many ideas. Here are a few…

Discipline – This was my first “one word” from back in 2012, and it was the year I started working out on a regular basis and focusing on personal health. Total game changer.

Also… Elevate, trust, joy, stretch, acceptance, happiness, freedom, momentum, growth, unstoppable, shine, minimize, rebuild, peace, silence, brave, curious, perspective, thrive, aware, fresh, quiet, travel, adventure, journey, accelerate, game-changer, win, search, commit, dedicate, meaning, true, love…

If you choose to jump on this train, I highly recommend that you share your word with a few members of your tribe, write it down and put it front and center somewhere you see often. There are also other resources, including a website, which lets you join others across the world in the process.

In closing, I will share that selecting a word could be a challenge. Since I’ve done this a few years, I always want to give it some real thought and try to hear from God on what would be the most powerful word to help direct me. That said, my word for 2018 was “revival,” and I didn’t really understand it fully at the time, but felt it was clearly supposed to be my word.

Here is what I wrote in last year’s blog (referencing a message I had just heard at that time about “revival” being a “season of reintroduction”): “Revival is a time where God reintroduces himself, exposes you more to your next assignment, and gives you insights to conquer that next level.” As it turns out, it actually was a year of reintroduction, but in many ways not at all how I would have even began to predict or understand January 1. I think that is a fun part of this journey… sometimes what you think at the onset is not how it ends up.  

What we can count on is that 2019 will be an adventure! Have a terrific weekend everyone!  

Unexpected Gifts, Part 2 – Taking count & giving thanks

So, the entire idea of “Unexpected Gifts” I mentioned Tuesday has me on a path to identify and take account of those that I have experienced this year. I hope you will find some value in the idea that no matter what a possible “shit show” you think your life can be in some seasons, there are quite literally gifts at every turn.  (okay, so that was a strong word, but the point is that in the midst of even the toughest times, crazy blessings show up if you are paying attention.)

I really don’t want to overuse examples of my life, but I think it may be useful as a thought starter for you all.

January-March: At that point I had a growing consultancy business. It was a time in my life where I felt God had me in a holding pattern. Although I was completely unclear about where I was headed, I was constantly sent not only encouraging people, but clients that needed my service. Most of these I had never met and all came at the perfect timing. (Also, I turned 50… I think that is a gift of some sort of new stage of wisdom, right? So far, it’s a lot of extra time on the treadmill to keep up. Haha)

April-June: Our family was faced with what many of my friends are facing right now… The impact of aging parents and a health crisis. My mother suffered multiple seizures and all of a sudden our world as we knew it stopped so that we could attend to the situation. So many unexpected gifts here, including a renewed focus on how precious these years are, to quality time with relatives that we don’t normally get to connect with as much. What a powerful reminder that my world is filled with dear friends from all parts of my life that stood ready in whatever way was needed, to a deeper realization of the vast needs in our health care system. Since health care is my career, this opened up my eyes to see the incredible opportunities for improvement we have to address from the patient side. (Also, without my consultant business, getting away for a lengthy time period would have added way more stress – another gift).

Also during this time, I was recruited to lead Partners in Primary Care (senior-focused primary care clinics) and Transcend MSO for the Kansas City Community. The picture is a small part of our team. These people quite simply blow me away with their commitment to our community’s seniors and really to one another. The clinics have only been in KC for a year in October and these people are family as if they’ve worked together for years. That is a far reaching gift that will impact their lives and all around them in their homes and those these serve.

July-September: God placed some pretty incredible new friends in my life this summer. I will absolutely never get over how we are given what we need at the perfect time. These people have gotten me out of the house, and have shined a new light on the incredible importance of a tribe.  I am certain I have not seen a group love each other so well.

So, those are a few thoughts. I have at least 10 more significant examples and I think you will too if you take the time to really audit these unexpected gifts.

Have the best weekend leading up to our week of thanks with family and friends.