To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

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Why you need a security detail

I hope this hits some of you like it did me. I have a security detail, and I hope you do as well! It may be that you need to rethink who is in yours, and perhaps even add one or more key folks to the team.

You may be thinking, “What is a security detail?” My son even asked about it when he saw me working on this post. According to Wikipedia, a security detail is a “Personal Protection Detail (PPD); a protective team assigned to protect the personal security of someone.” So, who is protecting you? People who “have our back,” and push us and make us better. People who we primarily choose, though often God blesses us with family members who are incredible at ensuring we are covered, protected, confronted, redirected, and gently pushed toward a positive direction. My sister has always had my back full on and what a gift that has been.

So, what are some of the critical areas where this is essential to a successful life? Here are some thoughts…

Your personal physical and mental health… Everything from exercise and fitness to those girl’s nights out that fill your spirit.

Your financial wellness and ability to find freedom in that area… A trusted advisor who comes alongside you and offers clarity around some often complex and private decisions.

Your career and in the workplace… This one is huge. I’ve blogged before about the need to have a champion – a few, if possible – that you know without a doubt will lift you toward great success.

Your spiritual life and your ability to navigate the complexities of life in general… Who do you know that is locked in to their faith and can help you build yours?

If I think through “who has my back,” I can come up with a short list that I know without a doubt want to see me succeed in many areas. I have, however, gone seasons without that “someone” in some of these areas. This is a call to action if you find yourself in that same boat, so to speak.

It takes intention to seek out this type of help. I personally like to have people that are ahead of me in life, or who have experience in an area at a much higher level than I have. These people offer me the opportunity to level up, and they can hold me accountable because of their experience having already walked this path.

Have a crazy-good week. Make it that way.

Add to your tribe if needed, and know that no matter what, most people are good, and the universe wants you to succeed in all that you dream and desire to accomplish!

Simple Thoughts Sunday: You are meant to flourish – 4 steps to move forward this summer

Flourish… Grow… Prosper… Develop… Multiply – I love all of it.

God indeed intends for us to flourish. To become… To live out our purpose fully and with joy.

On Friday night, our church, Hillsong KC, had a women’s “sisterhood” night. It was a ton of fun and I had many friends join me, which made it all the more powerful. I believe God shines brightest when we are unified in our praise, celebration and, like it or not, in our struggles. The major takeaway for me was something I thought you all may find worth your attention as well: Co-pastor Liz Turner shared 4 steps for us to consider taking this summer. I hope you join me in putting them into action! (I do have to say that I surprisingly am somewhat of a traditionalist with many things, but the fact that she co-leads the church is awesome! It’s rare to see a woman as integrated in a key role at a church. Her spirit and passion make a huge difference to so many. More faith-filled women please!)

Here you go… SO GOOD!

1.) Sit down and spend some time truly thinking about what you are believing God for this summer… identify it and write it down.

2.) Ask God what He wants you to focus on. Do this through prayer and contemplation, reading scriptures… identify it and write it down.

3.) Stay connected with others that hold this same focus and intent for their lives. Speak life to one another and stand together. Be vulnerable as to where you may need support. God has assigned the right people to help you in this phase of your life.

4.) Ask for accountability. Make a personal, faith-filled declaration of who you are and where you are going. Share it and speak it over your life.

I’m going to work on this today. If you join me, let me know! Praying your week is absolutely brilliant, and that you set a spark to ignite a summer of flourishing.

What does it look like to stand together?

This is a truly wonderful season, full of hope and excitement as graduates of all ages cross the stage. Graduation represents an accomplishment worth celebrating, but I believe the best part is that they offer the opportunity to take us to the next level of our adventure. New seasons require higher levels of support, so the thought of “standing” together is where my mind is today.

Taking a stand with or for someone is one of the highest levels of service we can provide to those we love.

So, what does that look like exactly? I thought some examples may be helpful to get your creative juices rolling (Of course I know everyone would love to hear some of yours so please add them below!):

Taking a stand for or with could be…

Advocating for someone you work with – Sending an email to their leader to let them know what a difference they make in your day to day endeavors is something I believe is simple, yet supremely significant.

Ensuring support is there for a young man or woman to achieve their personal dreams – What if we all asked the next new high school or college graduate we met what we could do to help them at this stage in their life? Life is absolutely packed with chances to reach out and help someone by introducing them to the right person, or even a book that may change their life.

Taking action on a unified issue – Who in your circle is fighting the good fight over something that’s important to them and that you agree with Perhaps it’s a social justice issue, or perhaps it’s as simple as someone trying to push forward a plan to improve wellness in the workplace. Whatever it is, don’t be afraid to jump in and lend a hand, your voice and energy.

We all thrive when we stand together. I hope that you take a small – or a large – stand this week… I know that when we do that, we will also RISE TOGETHER. Cheering you all on.

It takes a strong person to be kind

An excerpt from Maria Shriver’s short read, “I’ve been Thinking,” was powerful to me:

“We all want to be treated with kindness, because we are all struggling in some way, shape or form. I had to learn this as an adult, because growing up in a large, competitive, and tough Irish Catholic family, I used to confuse kindness with weakness. When I grew up, I learned differently. I now understand that kindness doesn’t mean weakness. You have to be really strong to be kind…You have to be really mindful … A person may look ‘happy on the outside,’ but who knows what’s happening on the inside.”

Some of the strongest people I know are also the kindest. And many have been through or are going through some crazy-hard life situations. They show up with a hug or inspirational words despite facing great loss and suffering. Knowing that was proof enough for Maria’s message to resonate with me.

I know that God has given me enough grace in some of my own “most difficult life experiences” to allow me to “show up” as kind and generous in my actions despite how I really felt inside. I can’t take credit for this because, like most of humanity, I’m not strong enough on my own. I give thanks for that to both by faith and a strong tribe of friends and family that surround me.

Today, be proud of yourself for showing up kind, in the midst of whatever is going on in your life. The ability to do so reveals great strength. I believe we definitely make the world better by showing kindness in every possible moment we can…especially when it’s the hardest to do so. You know what else is fun? Doing so likely will have the outcome of making us feel happier, which is a pretty cool by-product.

Being realistic about getting to a happy life

I had a revelation on Saturday. I am not entirely sure where it came from, but one of my dear friends was sharing with me that she didn’t know if she would ever get to happiness. I had a strong, clear reaction which kind of surprised me to be honest (since, like I’m sure many of you, sometimes happiness can be hard to nail down…). I guess it was somewhat of a lightbulb moment or a personal epiphany. Here’s what I responded to her statement:

Happiness is a moment – and then another moment.

I went on to say that sometimes I feel that America gives us a false hope that happiness is something we obtain – a pinnacle or a mountaintop where we stay once we achieve. (I also may have said that it was an American fantasy from hell, but maybe that was a bit strong?) In this moment, I somehow owned this while I was saying it. While I’m clearly not a researcher on happiness, I am compelled to believe this is the absolute truth.

Sure, happiness “is a choice” most days and through most seasons. We can choose to find joy in the smallest pleasures, like a light breeze hitting our face on a warm day, or a courageous flower popping up through the sidewalk crack. Oftentimes, happiness eludes us. We look right past the elderly couple holding hands in the grocery store, or the fact that we woke up breathing, or that were able to celebrate another birthday with friends and family.

Happiness… It’s in both the experiences we choose and those that choose us. A season of questioning or when your spirit just isn’t joyful, doesn’t mean you aren’t happy. It just means you are normal and that happiness is about to catch you again! Be on the lookout for those. A happy life is a compilation of happy moments. Cheering you all on!

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Why acts of kindness belong at the top of our to-do list

“Outdo one another in honor.” Romans 12:10

This verse… is my life verse. This verse has the power to change the world alone. It gives us clear instruction to be devoted to one another in love and honor. It showcases that our humanity is here to help each other rise above and face both challenges and celebrations by turning our attention off of ourselves and on to the people God surrounded us with…even if we may not support their approach or their actions.

My dear friend Mindy Corporon is the most courageous and honoring person I know. Mindy’s story is known by many in our community, and now around the world. Her son and father – along with another lady in Kansas City – were brutally killed 5 years ago by a man whose life was infiltrated with hate. Her choice was to focus on the above – to love and to develop understanding, ultimately allowing her to get to honor. That’s a heavy story and the boldest example of what it means to love even though we flat out don’t want to. The significance of that cannot be described.

A part of this journey has resulted in the Faith Always Wins Foundation and this week’s Seven Days – Make a ripple, change the world. This week is set aside each year to bring our community together to focus on how we get to love and honor by raising our awareness of our differences and embrace all who are walking this journey with us.

The Seven Days events culminate tomorrow night with the Seven Days Faith and Love Walk. The focus that day is ONWARD. The power of locking arms with each other is profound. The back of the t-shirt for the event is perfect: #HeyWhatsYourRippleOfKindness. I hope you will consider grabbing a friend and join us at the WW1 Museum and Memorial at 6 p.m. It’s a short walk and the community engagement will strengthen your hope and infuse your life with love.

Acts of kindness are the ultimate example of living this out. They bring hope to the room, elevate the energy around us and even save lives.

So hey, what’s your act of kindness going to be? I think we need to start each day with this at the top of our to do list. With Easter week upon us, there is not a better time to spread love in every space we enter. Have the best week!

My top books of 2019 – so far

Happy Tuesday! Today’s a good day to share what I’ve learned so far this year through my readings. They have all been good, with Notorious RBG, The Art of Gathering & Joyful being my favs.

I picked one take away from each of them and shared it below. If you decide to grab one let me know what you think (or if you’ve read them already)! Have an amazing week!

The Messy Middle, by Scott Belsky – This is a leadership read that is pretty heavy in content (it took me a while to get through it and truly digest the information). One of my favorite insights was on “organizational debt,” which is “the idea of ‘bounty program’ … in this system, any employee who encounters a policy or process that is hindering their ability to deliver value to the customer can submit the policy/process and a recommendation to the program website. The idea is to incentivize everyone to bash inefficiencies and dumb practices that contribute to organizational debt.”

The Art of Gathering, by Priya Parker – So much amazing work in this book. I’d grab this one for sure if you like to read. One simple idea here: “If you want a lively but inclusive conversation as a core part of your gathering, eight to twelve people is the number you should consider. Smaller than eight, the group can lack diversity in perspective; larger than twelve, it begins to be difficult to give everyone a chance to speak.”

Girl, Wash Your Face, by Rachel Hollis – This book is just so fun. It’s a simple read/self help type of book with some profound thoughts. One particular idea that I liked: “1.) I went to therapy. 2.) I hustled for joy. (love, love, love this) 3.) I reordered my list.”

Woke Church, by Eric Mason – I read this alongside a beautiful young professional I sometimes get a chance to mentor. It’s a call to justice and about understanding how socioeconomic, philosophical and historical realities inform our responsibility. An abbreviated excerpt from the back of this book says it best: “The church in America should have rejected the first whispers of slavery. But we didn’t. We should have stopped segregation and Jim Crow before they affected communities. But we didn’t. We should have been woke, but we’ve been asleep.”

Joyful, by Ingrid Fetell Lee – A really interesting and fun read that covers the full gamut of joy. One idea I appreciated: “I began to notice that while the topic of work-life balance comes up frequently in media, play is largely absent from the conversation… The most joyful people I know manage to hold space for play in their adult lives (think playing a sport, family game night, etc.).

The 10X Rule, by Grant Cardone – A classic book that has been around for a bit. So many key parts to this, but the one I hadn’t heard and resonated the most: “You must keep adding wood until the fire is so hot that no one – and nothing – can put out your success.” This was a call to action around all areas of your life! Keep adding wood my friends to what’s important to you!

Notorious RBG, by Irin Carmon and Shana Knizhnik – Honestly you should read this no matter what your political interests or otherwise area. This absolutely fun read about the life of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Gisburg is terrific in at least 100 different ways. I love all of it, but this quote in the beginning received a few stars: While reading her dissent in a voting rights case, she quotes Martin Luther King directly, “The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice,” she said, but then she added her own words: “If there is a steadfast commitment to see the task through to completion.” Now that is true and powerful.

The 5AM Club, by Robin Sharma – I have followed Sharma for many years and his latest is a great reminder of the power of taking over our days by starting out right. His section on the 4 focuses of history-makers is solid: 1) Capitalization IQ (“What makes a legendary performer so good isn’t the amount of natural talent they are born into, but the extent of that potential they actualize and capitalize.”) 2) Freedom from Distraction 3) Day Stacking 4) Personal Mastery practice.

Farsighted, by Steven Johnson – The book is all about how we make decisions and how to make better ones. His compelling first comments, “Countless studies have shown, humans are wired to resist losses more than to seek gains,” set you off on a deeper understanding of how our habits and even wiring may not help us make the best decisions and how we should consider understanding at a deeper level how to make better choices.

Chasing Daylight, by Eugene O’Kelly – I have blogged previously about this excellent, short read. Mr. Kelly wrote this book over his last few months after an unexpected illness took over his body at 53 years old. It’s a powerful reminder to to live intentionally. “To get the most out of each moment and day-and not just pass through it.”

Go deep: We need to build our root system

Throwback from 2017- some thoughts as you wrap up your week strong!

If you’ve ever stood under a redwood tree, you know that their height is something magnificent. And yet, the extent of their root system is shockingly not deep at 6-12 feet. So, how do we account for the crazy growth, with many reaching 300 feet tall? (The tallest pine measures in at 268 by comparison.)

“Redwoods create the strength to withstand powerful winds and floods by extending their roots more than 50 feet from the trunk and living in groves where their roots can intertwine.”

Perfect! Another cool illustration for how important going deep in your relationships is to your ability to grow and optimize your gifts. Of course, I love this – and so should you!

“Community” is what allows us to live a joy-filled life. (“Community” is also defined as families, friendship groups, circles, tribes, colleagues… you get my drift.)

To serve well, it is almost required that we are encouraged, held accountable and ultimately pushed toward our best self. For most of human history, this has been a normal part of life, starting out with the earliest Native American tribes and, for my generation, playing kickball in the street until well after the sun went down. Today, many find themselves immersed in technology and other distractions. That seems almost too obvious to state but when the shoe fits… Heck, I don’t even like to get out of my car to go in the bank. God forbid I can’t take care of business on my phone or through a machine.

I like the idea of going deep. I need to work more at this. I’d love to achieve the greatness of a redwood grove… to lock arms together with some amazing people and establish root systems that allow us all to grow and flourish.

What do you NEED today?

So… what do YOU need today?

What will absolutely brighten your day?

Fill your soul? Lighten your load?

Spark a fire?

Ignite your creativity?

What would it take to go do that? What would you or someone else have to do to make that happen? Spring is all about fresh life, hope, joy… Our life is ours to create, to curate, and to actually live in abundantly!

Sounds easy, right? Maybe for some. But in case you are like me and struggle with this at first, I want to share a mind mapping exercise I use to make this happen each year.

I start by putting each of my life’s main categories (finance, career, family, spiritual etc.) on paper, then I develop 2-3 key action items for each one of them to ensure I achieve my personal goals or dreams. My new addition to this exercise today is asking: Where can I add joy, – or, what would brighten my days? – in each area? For example, instead of “spend more time with my family,” perhaps I could expand that to “embark on a Saturday road trip with my sister by the end of May.”

I’d love to hear your ideas!

Here’s to a great week and the best spring ever – let’s make it so!

Let’s give care to our true priorities this weekend

Always such a strong topic to keep top of mind. How are you doing, now that we are closing in on the end of the first quarter for the year? From where you started the year, has your schedule aligned with your goals, dreams and desires? Have you spent enough time where you want?

I personally have been heavy with career and not enough on financial health (I’m in the group that hasn’t filed taxes yet); and moderately successful with physical health and relationships thanks to some pre-scheduled events so to speak. (If not for those, it wouldn’t look good at all.) I share that for the purpose of being vulnerable and yet exposing that no matter how much you “want” to do the right thing and be balanced, you can easily fall off of your game plan. Life tends to dictate itself if we don’t edit and actively and mindfully move it where we want.

So, you may be thinking: what’s up with the “deep priority” comment? What makes it deep versus just a priority? This, to me, is the “next” level. Saying I want to grow and nurture relationships is one thing, but what do I really want or need? For example, I haven’t spent any time this year with my dad. That’s not good, and that’s important.

Also deep: Being more specific is critical. Using the example of physical health and wellness, saying that I want to be successful in this category alone frankly won’t move the needle. What might move the needle is a deeper and specific goal, perhaps increased time doing cardio, lifting weights, etc., signing up for a “race” or some event that drives me toward success? Thinking out loud, here.

As we think through the last three months, it may be timely to take a long look at our priorities and develop an action plan that aligns.

Cheering everyone on and especially my NCAA bracket! Sun, please come out to stay!