To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

Powerful

Life is measured by love: Upping our love game this week

(revisiting a post from 2020)

Who doesn’t love puppies? (Okay, kittens, too. Heck, let’s add baby ducks and chickens!) I ran across a tweet from Pope Francis today that stopped me in my tracks. I couldn’t get it out of my head, so I am hoping this is as powerful for you this week.

The tragedy we are experiencing summons us to take seriously the things that are serious, and not to be caught up in those that matter less; to rediscover that life is of no use if it is not used to serve others. For life is measured by love.

Is that not just perfect?! I love this idea of “summoning us.” As in, I am calling you into my life. I am bringing in all that is good and lovely and true.

The last couple of years have revealed again that suffering and joy often come linked together, hand in hand. We learn through both, and when we take the focus off of ourselves and instead dedicate ourselves to service and love, we are able to better find joy in all circumstances.

How can we all love the best this week? Serve the best? How can we take the focus off of all things COVID-19 and world drama and become a pain reliever for someone in need? How can we shift the energy and the story to create stories of love? As a Christian, Jesus spent time cleaning the feet of the disciples… this was in a time and geography that certainly would have made this an especially sacrificial act. This urges me to dig deep and think outside of my normal service patterns. I know if you are reading this, you are likely a “giver” and someone who constantly focuses in this way, but I am thinking this is a call to going deeper still. What is one thing I can do to in sacrifice in service to another?

Cheering everyone on, and praying for you and your loved ones. May the Lord cover each of you and inspire your minds and dinner time (and Super Bowl) conversations with innovative ways to up the ante on our capacity to spread love this week.

Simple Thoughts Sunday: A week of courage

Ryan Holiday is a terrific author. I have read almost all of his books (Ego is the Enemy, The Daily Stoic and Stillness is the Key (my fav)). His latest, “Courage is Calling” is worth a week of blog posts. I hope you will find these as wonderful (and helpful) as I have. Ryan’s books are easy reads – small but mighty.

On Sunday I try to focus in on how faith coincides with key insights that help us build better lives. Courage is a hot topic in this arena, and even those who weren’t raised around the church are usually familiar with the David and Goliath story. The epic battlefield scene that called on the least likely warrior (a young boy) to lead his tribe to victory in defeating the town giant. Sometimes life’s giants call us to overcome our fears with a strong dose of courage. How we might do that is worth some dialogue.

Lucky for us, there are countless people throughout history who have displayed crazy bravery. From Nelson Mandela, to Malala, to Teddy Roosevelt, Martin Luther King Jr., Rosa Parks or perhaps your own parents or grandparents. The stories are worth learning and relearning in my opinion. In his writing, Holiday spends quite a bit of time focused on Florence Nightingale. I didn’t know just what an amazing human she was, and what a beautiful example of every day courage she demonstrated. I’m planning to spend more time on her in Wednesday’s blog. Today, I am focusing on perhaps the key to conquering our fears…

“We must make courage a habit,” is what was my greatest takeaway when you strip it all down. There are endless examples, from athletes who didn’t expect to hit the game-winning goal, to the lawyer who stood in front of the mirror reciting their rebuttal over and over, to the teenager who walked the halls before school started to get a bit more comfortable with that feelings of entering their next stage of life.

He continues, “How can you trust that you will step forward when the stakes are high, when you regularly don’t do that even when the stakes are low? So, we must test ourselves.” That is soooo good to me! The idea of how we navigate our own everyday lives by practicing the good we hope to produce seems fundamental, yet complicated. The decisions we make even when thinking about helping others with our resources comes to mind. Sometimes we are too afraid of not having enough, that we don’t give generously, even though we know we could meet a need of our friend or co-worker. Ruminating on the idea of practicing... testing ourselves doing everyday good is worthy of our thinking and of our efforts.

As we think through the idea of testing on the big things, It is clear that we must start with small things. The adage, “Do one thing each day that scares you,” is a step in that direction. I believe we must always be pushing ourselves to the other side of our comfort zone.

I recently finished up my scuba diving certification and it was way out of my comfort zone. Honestly, that surprised me, because I’ve always been an avid swimmer, but the idea of carrying around an oxygen tank on your back and going 30 feet under seems daunting. Nevertheless, I made it a personal goal to do hard things, especially as I get older. The instructor almost didn’t get me to finish because I was quite adamant that I just didn’t want to, and frankly didn’t see the point during that moment of near panic. The bottom line is that I, for some reason, was too scared. He ultimately was successful by getting me to just “go on a little swim” over and over until I eventually built up the courage to keep going so I could pass the certification. It may seem like an insignificant example but I assure you, this is how I and others have done almost everything that was scary to them: by continuing to move forward, one small step at a time.

Regardless of if it’s deciding to push yourself physically, to become emotionally uncomfortable for a bit while you address a hard conversation, or if it’s something spectacular, it all starts by practice – forward progress in the direction you are headed. David did this during his daily practice as a shepherd boy, and most likely so did everyone else that has encountered a courageous moment.

My faith gives me courage, and my friends do as well. My boys give me this unbelievable desire to stay strong and be courageous in all that I do. I hope that you will feel called to be courageous and in one way or another, be inspired to practice courage daily. Sometimes just getting through the day should be considered practice. Sometimes we have to think through what areas of our lives have we really not prepared ourselves really well? What stress or pain points need confronted with a bit of Rosa Park’s bravado? I have a short list and imagine you may as well.

As I close out today’s post, I leave you with my son’s favorite Bible verse. It’s a good one and he picked this in 3rd grade, proving it is never too early. “Be on your guard. stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.” (1 Corinthians 16:13).

I think I’ll go try to do that this week! Anyone else?

Stretch your body…stretch your mind

Stretch your body…
Stretch your mind…
Stretch your impact!

Happy Sunday! I’m all in on the blue zones and this wonderful photo of an older man stretching was just the inspiration I needed for today’s post. 

It’s spring, which is such a refreshing time, in part due to the ability to get outside more and move our bodies. Once we amp up the movement, it becomes clear fairly quickly that we might benefit from stretching to alleviate tight and sore muscles. It’s no surprise that one of the guiding principles of aging according to Blue Zones is stretching in order to maintain flexibility and mobility. Believe it or not, it also improves our energy levels. I’m all in for natural energy boosters! 

This idea of stretching has my mind bending toward what areas of life would also benefit from stretching. To me, knowledge is what I hope to stretch in the most. I am an avid reader already, which is the single best thing I can do to expand how I think, and learn from brilliant minds in so many areas. In today’s world where we are hit on all sides with headlines or just short bursts of information it’s really hard to know what to believe without diving in. To me, this is among the top five challenges of our life time. We all would be better if we committed to actually exploring and thinking  deeply about topics that impact our conversations and lives. We would be better yet if we actually study different points of view so we can embrace a larger perspective.

All in, I believe we can make a great impact by stretching! I am praying I can do so in the right directions and that God will lead me at every turn.  Have the best week!

Here we go, 2021: Let’s dive right in to the new year

Most of you have likely spent time reflecting on 2020, putting thought into what you’d like to accomplish in 2021. If not, perhaps today is the day to set aside time to really think through where you have been, what you have learned, and who has impacted your life. This effort always makes me feel like I have a more clear picture when working toward the plan I need to put in motion. They say that writing down your thoughts and goals is a key part of achieving them. I totally agree with that. To me, diving in after you write them down is the only option. Taking action not only feels good, but it drives us forward.

What areas of your life do you need to take action on? So many of your ‘one words‘ were so good and inspiring. How do you plan to make that happen? What does peace look like when it’s played out? More time alone to reflect? A deeper prayer life? Time set aside time each morning? What does joy look like? More time with friends? Family? Pets? Doing what fills your soul? What do I need to let go of to optimize my life? How much of an impact can I make?

As you dive in, please know that you have a tribe of people supporting, encouraging and praying for you! I truly believe we can all accomplish whatever it is that helps us be our best. Of course that means, serving well!

Here’s to a more than meaningful and joyful year ahead and a decade that increases our capacity for love and justice. Thank you so much for taking time to read these brief insights. Cheers to you all!

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Happy new year, 2021

One of the doctors I used to work with had a rather large sign in her office, that said, “This is not Burger King, and you can’t have it your way.” I loved that. I feel like for the last few decades at least, we have been pushed this message all around us… “You deserve a break today,” (McDonalds) “Have it your way,” and now “Be your way” (Burger King), “Because you’re worth it,” (L’Oréal) We’ve been convinced we need a $5 coffee (OK, maybe we do need that?), a large house, a really nice SUV…. you get the point.

Like most of you, I love technology, new products and am a fan of evolving as a society. That said, Door Dash and Whole Foods delivery is now a “thing” in my house. I also have fallen for pretty much every one of those messages… I’m normal, and honestly, if you’ve ever done any mission work, you might know that this is not a great thing about America.

As the new year rolls in, it seems like as good as time as any to hit pause and really seek wisdom. What do I really need? When we were family campers at Pine Cove, one of the messages that stuck with me was “A choice to spend a dollar somewhere, is a choice to not spend it somewhere else.” Hmmm…. That’s clearly true, and yet, I too easily buy that latest Kansas City t-shirt perhaps a bit too quickly & definitely without registering that the same $15 might serve a better purpose in the community.

Regardless of how much it may appear that our society is thriving, it doesn’t take much research to see that 10% of people in Johnson County, Kansas and 15% in Jackson County, Missouri are food insecure (per Feeding America). In addition, of those, almost 60 percent of Kansans and 40 percent in Missourians are ineligible for federal nutrition programs (incomes above 185% of poverty). At an average meal cost of $3.42 in Kansas and $3 in Missouri, the additional needs come in at a VERY BIG NUMBER ($78M and some change)! That’s where on the ground and local food pantry resources kick in. They need all minds educated and activated on this truth.

Those are the brutal facts. Perhaps this is the year I take a hard look at what I’m spending my resources on and take concrete action to ensure it is being used in a way that aligns with my life goals. (Which certainly doesn’t include having more cute t-shirts.)

It’s Sunday! It’s the first Sunday in the new year and I hope you find yourself positioned to take on 2021 with whatever it is YOU NEED! No matter what it is, I hope you know that you have a team of people praying for you to find your power and strength, and to forge ahead with so much positivity and momentum.

Leading with expectancy…

This one may take a few to register… Lead what? A bit of a narrative shift is how it was presented to me: “Choose this day to NOT lead with limitation or lack.” It was in the category of fitness, but seemed to resonate across the spectrum of life. If you do a “thought check” during a workout, or even during the work day when you are facing a tough situation or challenge, you may find that your mind has shifted to your limitations. Especially when it comes to physical challenges, you might find your mind reciting over and over again that you can’t reach the next level, “after all, you are doing amazing work just showing up to run/bike/hike, etc… so take it easy on yourself…” (Sound familiar?)

I also heard this week in an entirely different situation/conversation, that we actually only perform physically at about 40 percent of what we actually could. I was shocked by that number, thinking for sure it would be closer to 70 percent. Next time you think you can’t go any further, press forward… you can achieve far more than your mind wants you to believe.

I love this artistic photographer, Meg Loeks. This photo is beautiful in so many ways, but I especially love the spirit of this little girl –– running ahead, wind in her hair, joy on her face, expectant for whatever comes ahead, and fully confident in taking on this day.

Let’s go into our days with that level of expectancy. We are stronger than we believe, we are capable, we are brave and we are designed for greatness.

Faith, in action: A powerful reminder that will strengthen us all

Here’s what happened this week. Profound.

I have been fighting for a bit over a week now with vertigo (dizziness) due to a chronic inner ear issue I have that flares up a few times a year. This time, it was much worse. I have fought my whole life with the need to be “in control,” so this inability to function normally absolutely drives me crazy! (Laughable, I know, because we all know how little of that we have. Yet… I persist.)

Life is unpredictable. God often grabs my attention (and this time perhaps pinned me down…) by reminding me that the plans that have been laid out for my life far exceed what I could dream up, initiate or “control.” I’m thankful for this, but for some reason my nature is to hold on tight. All that said, I wasn’t doing too well with this episode of feeling like I was pushed off of the road, so to speak.

I was focused on work on Tuesday afternoon when an intense episode came upon me. It took me aback and I sat there contemplating what to do next (as in, am I even able to get up, walk, and go tell someone?). In comes one of our team members. I happen to know this person is a fierce person of faith so I shared my situation. They moved on for their break and on their way out the door said something like, “I’m happy to pray for you.” That alone was comforting. But wait…

A few minutes later, they came back in and shared that their family was really working on “faith in action” and asked if I minded if they prayed over me quickly. I was more than happy to receive that covering. The whole thing undid me, and I found myself shaken not only by the dizzy spell, but overwhelmed by the fact that another person would take a few minutes to pray a genuinely beautiful and thoughtful prayer over me. I was moved to tears. I remember feeling strong enough to drive the 30 minutes home –– at least in that moment.

The experience was profound. The prayer, yes, but also the story… WOW. How often have I said “I’m praying for you” to someone? How many times did I have the chance to in that very moment either reach out for their hand or otherwise pray with them right at that time or even pick up the phone? You can guess the answer to that.

Faith, in action. This is a simple, yet incredibly powerful way to move to healing…. to love. I’m not sure where this teammate of mine is receiving their wisdom or guidance, but I want more of wherever that came from. If they happen to read this, I hope they know it was life-changing for me and perhaps will be for you as well. Their courage made all of the difference.

I hope this serves you all today and sincerely pray that it will strengthen you as you go into the new month afresh this week!

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Hold the tension until something beautiful comes forward

… As in the miracle of childbirth itself.
…As in that first real fight and talking through it until you both grow (my friend calls it building relationship muscle – I like that!).
…As in diligently digging yourself out of a tough financial situation.

All of these examples, while valid, don’t speak to the true tension most of us are feeling on this day. The voice of America is loud right now and God help us that it produces a path forward – a change in direction… a call for us all to not stop short of pursuing justice and equality until it is achieved.

This tension, and the beauty that could come forward after, is like deeply inhaling the mountain air. There is joy and peace in those places after much work has been done.

With so much heavy news over the last few months, and especially these last few weeks, I’m even more committed to this idea that we have to keep holding on… pushing thru. Beauty can come. I believe that.

Brené Brown’s wonderful “Unlocking Us” podcast episode with actors Jay and Mark Duplass on the Power of Paradox was deep and captivating.  The conversation –– not at all intended to take on the weight of the tensions we are facing in America in this moment –– offered the listener an opportunity to ignite thinking around tension, and how we might deal with it: pushing ourselves through the pain, committing to one another, staying unrelenting and strong.

Scripture shares the following:

“To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that He might be glorified.”

Isaiah 61:3 KJV

I’m not typically a King James advocate (preferring instead something I can relate to more easily), however this is genuinely spot on from my perspective.

The foundation on which we stand started with struggle, and God’s word offers us comfort in knowing that we can expect beauty from ashes. It would be too hard to believe, had I not have had personal exposure to the stunning reality. I have witnessed all manner of struggle… emotional and physical abuse, poverty, illness among those who were far too young, and even hate crimes and murder. I have seen God’s redemption in my story and in those of some dear loved ones at every turn.

I have also seen many stories, like those we face in America right now, resulting in tragedies that prove we are far from achieving equality to all. Stories that should bring tension to and haunt all of us. Stories that should ignite us to push harder, to act in some way…

I want to hold the tension along with my friends that represent every minority group, and to do so until we find something beautiful together. I believe we will find more tension first, but as a Christian believer, I hold strong on that if we stay tuned in, pray for direction and act with love that we can press forward together. We can heal and find beauty. I feel that. I also feel this will require a fight … a fight forward and toward unity.

On Wednesday’s blog my goal will be to provide a short list of actions (We must ACT versus just say/post/share.) that all audiences and ages can participate in. For today, check out the website www.bethebridge.com. It seems to be a great starting point.

If you happen to have an idea please reach out to me. Thank you!

Vibe check: So, how’s it really going?

We have somehow almost pushed our way through May. Virtual and adapted graduations have largely come and gone, school is wrapping up, and Memorial Day on Monday will be our official nod to the summer days ahead. Most of us have adjusted to our routines (Groundhog Day, anyone?) and, like it or not, are realizing that the parts of the reality we lived in a few months ago are now but a memory.

We forge on. Humans are resilient like that.

I love my Peloton bike and find the instructors to be inspiring and generally on point with messages that work for any rider, no matter where they may live. My latest, favorite motivational coach is Alex Toussaint. He has a motto: Vibe check! As in, how are we all doing?

With so many people working from home and having their lives disrupted in many ways, we may have moved too quickly to believing everyone has adapted and is doing okay. They may be doing “okay,” but are they thriving?

We all know that being off-center is normal in smaller doses, and that we generally bounce back. We need to remember that living in this feeling for longer periods of time can (and likely will) take a toll.

It feels to me like it’s time to check in on our vibe, as Alex would say. It’s time to check in on how we ourselves, honestly, are doing, as well as the ones we love.What can we do to help shift out of any place that’s not healthy and help lift each other up? What can we do to keep wellness top of mind? There are so many great resources out there. One of my favorites is from Dr. Michelle Robin, whose resources are life-changing. One of my favorite thoughts she shared just this week was in the context of “what are we dreaming of today,” authored by Carol Lakin.

D – Draft on those that believe in you
R – Relationship: be mindful of who is in your life
E – Enrich: always remember who lifted you up
A – Authentic: Do your work to make generational change (I love this. We can all use this time to give this thought. Moving toward fulfilling a purpose is always an ignitor for the soul.)
M – Meaning or Magic: thank you for giving me a magical life with meaning (I think this is a great time to share this message with someone who has had an impact on my life…)

I would love to hear your thoughts on wellness & how we can keep the vibe going strong. Cheers to warmer days and spreading lots of love where ever and whenever we can.

Shake it off

I asked one of my dear friend’s at work what she felt I should blog about today (what does the universe need right now?), and she emphatically said that I should use this video of our dog, Waffles.

Within moments, Wonder Woman (aka Ashley Jost, who is my right-hand blog professional), quickly made it happen to the tune of this great little clip from the one and only Taylor Swift. I tried to not like Taylor a few years back, but when her songs come on I find myself catching the vibe in a heartbeat. She’s fun and her spirit is contagious. The music lyrics here in “Shake it off” are right on point.

We all know the truth is that with this situation and with many others, we can’t simply “shake it off” completely, but we can identify the weights that bear us down and work to take a few off, replacing them with better energy and more positive or useful thinking. Taking a hard look at what is keeping us up at night, or causing that sick feeling in our stomach, is good for the heart and soul. One of the Twitter feeds I read last night, (@brokeymcpoverty) shared some of the most helpful content I have ever seen. It was an ask that went something like this, “To help make things a little easier – and noting that therapy is a luxury – ask some who are seeing a therapist (or virtually seeing) to spread the wealth and share their best tips.” Here are a couple that I felt were pure gold:

  • “Do you have to sink or swim? What if you just float?” (My fav!)
  • “Capture mood logs” (Journaling is a proven good idea to help process thoughts and experiences.)
  • “Lean into being uncomfortable. Fighting it is like fighting a wave in the ocean, you’ll end up exhausted and possibly feel worse.”
  • “Give equal space to the thought of ‘what if it all works out?'”
  • “Recognize that the whole world is grieving. You can’t expect to be the most productive you’ve ever been just because you have more free time. Everything about your life has drastically changed, be easy on yourself.”

So much good here and such a marvelous tie in to “shake it off.”

I know like me, many of you are doing your best to pray, to “call in” the positive energy and to advance our thinking so that we can come up with better approaches and solutions to dealing with this change. We are all in this together, so by all means, please share any wisdom you may find useful with other readers.

Depending on where you read this it may look like there are only a few readers, there are actually quite a few. In February there were 3,014 people reached through the blog with 550 engaging in some way. My goal with each post is for it to impact one person, and sometimes that person may only be myself, but still I forge ahead knowing this is what God has called me to do.

I share that with the ask that you share your thoughts early and often so that we can collectively share insights that can together shift our world to the positive. So much light to share and we need everyone on board!

So much love for you all!