To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

Living Your Passion

A Summer Series: Re-centering on what’s important

I am writing this on Sunday and it’s my mom’s birthday! Yay for 79th birthdays. Yay for life. As many of you who read this know, life is fragile… as in we or our loves ones can be living our best lives one moment and the next. Celebrations of all kinds are the very best parts of life; as is ensuring we are centered enough to devote our limited energy to what truly is important.

One of scriptures I’ve thought through often over the years references Jesus, “withdrawing to the mountain alone.” There are times he went with his disciples and times alone. I can resonate with that. At times, being alone seems crucial. And at times, I need to be surrounded by my best girlfriends (and of course my boys at other times!). The Bible references stories of him being among the “multitudes,” and then the need to remove himself to seek re-centering. I personally have always been more likely to want to “withdraw” to the water, and long walks on country roads or a wooded trail. Regardless, I envision Jesus resting in a cabin wherever he is, journaling, walking, napping, breathing deeply… all with an intentional focus on drawing himself closer to what he might hear from God. An attempt to find wisdom, to discern his next steps and to restore his soul so that he could engage fully.

This summer is different for me personally, so I don’t have any plans yet for a “cabin” retreat. I am in transition from KC to Arizona and my frequent travel is to make it back to see the fam. For 13 years, we went to a family camp, Pine Cove, in the beautiful Texas pines, and my heart and mind were always reinvigorated in the absolutely best way.

As I write this, I am realizing that this re-centering just has to happen, even this year, and probably, ESPECIALLY this year. When life get’s a bit crazier than we hope, we likely should double down on the recenter and restore playbook. My advice to my younger self, as well as all of those out there that may need it, is to absolutely commit yourself to this practice in your life. Stop what you are doing and create a retreat – any space that serves the purpose of restoration.

If you have favorite practices in this category of “re-centering” please send them my way and I’ll post out over the summer! I’ll be praying for all of you! Prayers for all good things… for just enough sunshine, ice cream cones, watermelon, fireflies, afternoon naps… and love overflowing.

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Look back at the evidence. Pursing a lifetime of celebrations.

It was truly wonderful to be at my son Sam’s law school graduation this week. Nineteen years of school and he’s now achieved the goal he set for himself as a young boy. Our lives are made of our hopes and dreams, and in the process we are exposed to all manner of people, thoughts, experiences, fears and even magical moments that fill the gaps on the way there. 

I love graduations because they force us to reflect. They force us to hold the weight of what we or a loved one has accomplished. As we wait for the graduates to march in, listen to voices of those who have shared this journey, as a teacher, mentor or peer… and finally watch them boldly take the stage to physically accept their diploma, our minds have the opportunity to process the significance of the moment.

One of the speakers used the thought above in his words to the graduates: “Look back at the evidence.” He went on to talk how the process of law school had “unearthed capacities” they didn’t know they had. I liked that. It seems life is always “unearthing” capacities we have no idea we can achieve. How cool! This narrative points us to how important it is to consider where we have walked and how our day to day small actions add up and ultimately curate the story of our lives.  Look back at the evidence of your life and revel in where you are today.  

Pursuing celebrations early and often has almost always been a life mantra of mine. I’m thankful for this week’s reminder. It’s spring, graduation season and the ideal time to absorb, reflect and yep… celebrate. Cheers to anyone who is a graduate or who may be celebrating someone they love this month. May those moments be held tightly and honored as they well should be.  

Simple Thoughts Sunday: Happy new year, 2021

One of the doctors I used to work with had a rather large sign in her office, that said, “This is not Burger King, and you can’t have it your way.” I loved that. I feel like for the last few decades at least, we have been pushed this message all around us… “You deserve a break today,” (McDonalds) “Have it your way,” and now “Be your way” (Burger King), “Because you’re worth it,” (L’Oréal) We’ve been convinced we need a $5 coffee (OK, maybe we do need that?), a large house, a really nice SUV…. you get the point.

Like most of you, I love technology, new products and am a fan of evolving as a society. That said, Door Dash and Whole Foods delivery is now a “thing” in my house. I also have fallen for pretty much every one of those messages… I’m normal, and honestly, if you’ve ever done any mission work, you might know that this is not a great thing about America.

As the new year rolls in, it seems like as good as time as any to hit pause and really seek wisdom. What do I really need? When we were family campers at Pine Cove, one of the messages that stuck with me was “A choice to spend a dollar somewhere, is a choice to not spend it somewhere else.” Hmmm…. That’s clearly true, and yet, I too easily buy that latest Kansas City t-shirt perhaps a bit too quickly & definitely without registering that the same $15 might serve a better purpose in the community.

Regardless of how much it may appear that our society is thriving, it doesn’t take much research to see that 10% of people in Johnson County, Kansas and 15% in Jackson County, Missouri are food insecure (per Feeding America). In addition, of those, almost 60 percent of Kansans and 40 percent in Missourians are ineligible for federal nutrition programs (incomes above 185% of poverty). At an average meal cost of $3.42 in Kansas and $3 in Missouri, the additional needs come in at a VERY BIG NUMBER ($78M and some change)! That’s where on the ground and local food pantry resources kick in. They need all minds educated and activated on this truth.

Those are the brutal facts. Perhaps this is the year I take a hard look at what I’m spending my resources on and take concrete action to ensure it is being used in a way that aligns with my life goals. (Which certainly doesn’t include having more cute t-shirts.)

It’s Sunday! It’s the first Sunday in the new year and I hope you find yourself positioned to take on 2021 with whatever it is YOU NEED! No matter what it is, I hope you know that you have a team of people praying for you to find your power and strength, and to forge ahead with so much positivity and momentum.

Easy is an ambush (a snare, a trap)

I especially love this synonym I found for easy: idiot-proof. 

When it comes to some basic things, like fixing a running toilet or a non-threatening sound coming from my car, easy is exactly what I’m looking for. This post isn’t about that.

I have to say, it’s really hard for me not to want to go straight to game day examples since we are coming right off of the BIG WIN, but I will resist because there are plenty of wonderful writers and thinkers filling our tanks with those strategies. (And I love every minute of it!)

Bringing us into focus, getting past our human desires to find comfort (Comfort food, anyone? Too many long & lazy weekends? An extra hit on the snooze button?) and to creating our best lives, we have to quickly get to the reality that easy truly is an ambush. What is an ambush? A surprise attack … that’s the primary definition. Something that sneaks up on us, like a surprise bill we weren’t counting on. Or consequences of a project we didn’t quite get to, or a health issue brought on by too many easy choices.

Idiot-proof should be the last thing we are looking for. We should instead be building our capacity, our skill set, moving toward healthy relationships and optimizing our energy. Those things require excellence and not ease. They require discipline, seeking great coaches, doing the deep thinking, hard work and praying.

Let us not be snared by the easy, but rather commit to going all in with all we have to be prepared, strong, healthy and at our very best in whatever season we are in.

I won’t ever get over the excitement of our Kansas City Chiefs Super Bowl LIV win!! I hope their effort inspires us all to keep throwing the ball downfield no matter what comes our way!

The Culture Connection: Why travel is a priority

Rewind! This is a throwback post – an oldie but a goodie – as I am traveling this week. Enjoy!

I have made travel a life priority.

Along the way, I learned that whatever your budget — and whatever your goals with travel — it can be done with a bit of research and flexibility. There are so many stories out there of poor college students backpacking across Europe, and travel blogs that showcase journeys around our vast world. This is encouragement to many, as travel can seem to be a goal achievable only after retirement, if at all. In my viewpoint, even a trip to the lake can be a much-needed cultural shift from our day-to-day lives.

As it pertains to my writing on this blog, I truly feel that in order to serve well (for me) that travel is essential to creating a greater understanding of the people we share this planet with.

Here’s why: Being immersed in different cultures allows us to stretch and grow beyond our normal experience.

I have learned that whether it be a trip to New York City, Chicago, San Diego, or abroad to say, Australia (or my current journey in Barcelona), the customs from the time they eat meals to the way they approach their day opens me to new, potentially life-changing perspectives.

For example, in bigger cities, you seldom see anyone overweight. This is likely due to their active lifestyles to some extent, with a dependence on walking as a major means of transportation. It forces me to consider how to incorporate more of that lifestyle into my own.

In most countries I have visited outside of the U.S., the pace of life seems to be less frenetic and more reasonable. Even the average vacation time they are offered by employers is almost triple what we find here in America. It ties to a focus on overall wellness, it seems. I believe our country has a lot to learn in this area. (Side note: I have not been to the Asian countries, which I understand are more hurried in their approach, and perhaps it is due to the size of the population.)

One of my favorite authors (Batterson) is known for saying “a change of place, offers a change of perspective.” That is so very true. Somehow, when you are able to remove yourself from your routine, your mind “shifts” to a neutral zone that allows you to more easily embrace the beauty that surrounds us, even in the seemingly simple matters. I believe that notion leads us to achieve creativity and engage in life with a more health focused approach.

I try to keep these short, so will stop here. As the North Face slogan goes, I hope that you will “Never stop exploring,” and I hope this has inspired you to travel, local or abroad — just get out there!

10 down, 2 to go… Let’s dive into THANKFULNESS

November is fantastic! The home stretch is in view and we should be sure to take account of the year and especially those people, lessons, and experiences that we need to show gratitude for. Some thoughts to kick start your mind…

Anything new in 2018?

Friendships, career changes, schools, homes, vehicles, trips, and yes, new arrivals! (I have some friends that have new babies or grandbabies — and oh my, that is the best thing to be thankful for!) 

Any lesson that has stuck with you?

How you handle transition? What you need to be the best version of yourself (sleep anyone)? How do you learn the best? What is your greatest teacher?

Anything painful that is stretching you?

Yep, I think we have to be thankful for those things too… annoying I know!

Anything that has brought you true joy?

Pets? Friends? Experiences? A simple conversation? A lunch date with your favorite friend? 

This list could honestly go on and on. I sit here and begin to reflect on ALL that has filled the last 10 months, and I am literally AMAZED by the blessings and gifts this year has brought. I will be honest and say it has been pretty hard as well, but even the tough parts are deep with meaning, serving as a part of my journey that I respect and appreciate.

I hope you will take some time to begin a month long process of identifying what those things are to you. I feel you will truly be blessed by what one year can bring. I am prayerful that you will find yourself with a big grin and a heart full of the magic of this life, knowing you are fully loved and fully in the process of achieving your purpose.

It’s better — truly better

Rewind! This post is a throwback to last fall. An oldie, but a goodie!

I am always fascinated by what makes a place “all of the rage.”

You know, those cult-like places where folks like us stand in line for hours waiting for our share of their awesomeness. In KC, there are several of these, but my favorite stand out right now is an ice cream place called BettyRaes.

(Photo creds: Canva)

It is SO HOT that Trip Advisor named it a top 50 “ice cream shops worth traveling for.” And it’s only a few years old, if that. Believe me, folks do travel for it and most days the line is out the door. But why? (Other than the s’mores sundae with coffee ice cream — pretty much is the best thing I’ve ever had…)

My perspective: It’s better. As in truly better.

It has created a unique offering via it’s menu. The service is better. The shop is community focused.

As Seth Godin, the famous marketer, would say: it’s achieved the notion of BETTER.

As we think through how we serve better, let’s think about what else we can do better. Be kinder, more focused on those around us, more open minded, more giving, more courteous drivers, more patient (that one resonates with me!), etc…

If you are in business — profit or non-profit — how can we be deemed “worthy” of a line out our door? We start by looking in the mirror and identifying areas where we can be better, and then we dive deep to get to worthy… and ideally, sustainable.

Your ideas are welcome!

(Here’s a song to get you in the mood and the mindset!)

Emotionally exhale this Labor Day weekend

(Photo Creds: Canva)

How are you making this Labor Day weekend count? I like to think that this holiday isn’t just about taking a break, but rather about emotionally exhaling.

This weekend used to wind down the summer before school started. Alas, that isn’t the case anymore. August’s onslaught of obligations, activities, etc. are in full force for most of us. But wait, didn’t summer just start? So obviously, Labor Day weekend is a really good time to take a breather.

“Emotionally exhaling” doesn’t take much. (That’s sort of the point.)

Reading, life planning, sharing a meal or two with friends or family, a visit to the farmer’s market, and  a chance to take in the last days of poolside bliss. Those work for me, but for others it’s about rock climbing, marathons and shopping extravaganzas. Reflect on what this weekend should look like for you based on the season of your life. Be a little selfish – you deserve it.

There is a great book that came out a few years ago called “The Best Yes” by Lysa Terkeurst. It calls out to us to make the best decision for ourselves at that given moment and season. So, what does your soul need this weekend? There is still time to make it happen.

Whatever you do with the rest of your long weekend, I hope that you will emotionally exhale.

I should probably…

So, what does it mean to you to “kick a**” ?   (Apologies if anyone is offended by the language reference.)

It’s like, “What is your perfect day? I’m thinking work as I write this, but a “kick a**” Saturday has an entirely different, awesome description. Think of it how you want, but definitely think about it.

What does a truly AWESOME, ENERGY-INSPIRING day look like?  

For me, it’s when I meet with some great people who share a vision or passion, or who energize me through their very approach to their craft. Or, when the conversation you walk away from inspires you. It’s when I am able to conquer massive emails and other communication needs AND run by Target on the way home. It’s when I am able to lift someone’s spirits or give them hope. When I am still going strong at 5 p.m., ready to keep rolling…

What is it for you?

If you can, pay attention to why this day happened in a way that you loved. What did you eat? How much sleep did you get the night before? Were you in control of your schedule that day, or was it a bit of others adding to your calendar and a bit of your own? After you can identify it, maybe you can duplicate it more often. Those days where you literally “kick it” should happen far more often in my opinion. What if you could be at the top of your game every day?

I love that idea… I think I should take my own advice and really identify that… It’s worth the “thinking” time. Have a great weekend. Design an awesome one! 

Why do we sometimes choose the second-rate version of ourselves?

I came upon an interesting conversation via a podcast and it really resonated. I hope it does with you, too.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we actually choose the second-rate version of ourselves. OUCH! Why would we do that?

Let me give you an example: Each year when I do the Daniel Fast for the first 21 days of the year, I feel GREAT during and after. Eating healthier, incorporating regular exercise, a diligent focus on sticking with a solid wake-up and nighttime routine coupled with less social media… it’s a game changer for me. So, why would I not live my life this way every day of the year? It’s a really good question.

I am guessing that a trained psychologist would say it is because we are accustomed to and find comfort in our routines. I mean, I really like queso and I do enjoy reading about the lives of those I love via social media.

Trying to find that “balance” of how you can “have your cake and eat it too” is the challenge we all face. My point of view is that it comes down to framing the question in a way that moves us to the potential negative side of the equation. For example: What happens if I choose more queso over having more energy and a healthier body?

I find myself living on the edge of this…trying to find the right mix of both. I suspect each year I try to “lean in” to the healthier side a bit more — but maybe only a tad bit. (The unfortunate part, however, is that as you age, the body isn’t as forgiving of that basket — or two — of chips!).

How about you? Sharing is caring, and I know we would all love to have a dynamic community tackle this topic of how to choose the best version of yourself. After all, it is there that we are meant to be, and there that we are able to serve the very best.