To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

Inspiration

The power of curiosity

I love kids. Their laughs are the best, and their questions are incredible. Some studies show that kids ask an average of 40,000 questions between ages 2 and 5. That’s 200-300 per day. (via Berger)

How many questions did you ask yesterday? The estimate for most adults is 20. (Quora) To me, curiosity is a key to great happiness and success in life. Nurturing our curiosity is a springboard for growth and knowledge, and I have always found the theory that “knowledge = power” to be more than true.

It seems like a really great time to IGNITE our curiosity. On Saturday, I had the chance to enjoy the late afternoon sunshine and explore a local park. Nature has so much to teach us and I found myself feeling a bit childlike again at the wonder of Spring… new life in bloom from the animals to the plants. What fun it is to see so many people and families connecting through nature during this time. For kids of all ages, curiosity provides the following:

  • Helps us to be better problem solvers
  • Helps us overcome our fears (“Hey, is that snake venomous? Is it safe to hold it?”)
  • Helps us develop empathy when we focus on asking and clarifying versus judging
  • Leads to humility
  • Creates a higher level of self awareness as we question our own whys, beliefs, and consider if there are other options we should consider

On the business side of things, making the case for developing a culture of curiosity is a game-changer for organizations that embrace the curiosity super power. In a stellar article, “The Business Case for Curiosity,” Fracesca Gino points out that cultivating curiosity at all levels helps leaders and their employees adapt to uncertain market conditions and external pressures. (Hello, COVID-19!) “When our curiosity is triggered, we think more deeply and rationally about decisions and come up with more creative solutions.” 

I particularly loved this quote from former Google CEO, Eric Schmidt: “We run this company on questions, not answers.” 

Above almost all actions we can take in today’s world, we need the fuel of questions to ensure we approach new challenges with rigor and fresh thinking. My thought is that we should use this time to raise the game on our own curiosity, look around and fill in the gaps, and serve one another in new ways. (And hey, I just realized its Earth Day on the day this posts…. what a wonderful way to honor this beautiful world by bringing forward a desire to learn all we can about its wonders!)

Connectedness forges resiliency…

… and its accrued effect results in stronger, healthier and braver humans. We are all going to suffer, but togetherness is more powerful than pain.”

Jen Hatmaker’s new book, “Fierce, Free and Full of Fire” releases this week officially and it’s pure gold. The excerpt that I put in the graphic is case in point. She covers everything from the need for us to be in community to spiritual curiosity, and all with such thoughtfulness. She easily – and with humor even, takes the reader back in history and brings in science to showcase the truth of human behavior and need. It is one of those books that you just know the world conspired for you to read at just this very time.

I wanted to add why I honed in on the above quote for today’s insight. Quite simply it is crucial. It’s a game changer. We instinctively know this, thus the immediate reaction for many to figure out how to use Zoom, Google Hangouts and other technology to bring us together with our tribes right now.  It’s been such fun to see the posts of family and friends enjoying each other’s company in this new world.

Here’s what I noticed: The first few weeks we did this well. We scrambled, pivoted and found a way forward. We are now in what I think of as the next phase: We have to stay resilient and diligent toward connecting.

Perhaps, even for some, the first few weeks were a welcome change from the grind. Extroverts and introverts alike rejoiced at the time to reboot and find stillness. As we move into yet another week, we must reach out early and often and, if needed, force ourselves to find points of connection. I have a couple of friends and family members that we text often, but I know in my heart that the voice is needed right now. As much as I’m not a “phone” person I need to change that this week, now more than ever.

Let’s be the people that lift up, bring energy and humor and love to our tribes… Text and email are great, but this week, let’s pay attention to actually embracing our loved ones with voice inflection and, if possible, a virtual face-to-face! I truly believe that her thought above is so true: this will bring us collectively greater…

Resiliency
Bravery
Strength &
Health

Cheering everyone on and sending love and prayers –

Shake it off

I asked one of my dear friend’s at work what she felt I should blog about today (what does the universe need right now?), and she emphatically said that I should use this video of our dog, Waffles.

Within moments, Wonder Woman (aka Ashley Jost, who is my right-hand blog professional), quickly made it happen to the tune of this great little clip from the one and only Taylor Swift. I tried to not like Taylor a few years back, but when her songs come on I find myself catching the vibe in a heartbeat. She’s fun and her spirit is contagious. The music lyrics here in “Shake it off” are right on point.

We all know the truth is that with this situation and with many others, we can’t simply “shake it off” completely, but we can identify the weights that bear us down and work to take a few off, replacing them with better energy and more positive or useful thinking. Taking a hard look at what is keeping us up at night, or causing that sick feeling in our stomach, is good for the heart and soul. One of the Twitter feeds I read last night, (@brokeymcpoverty) shared some of the most helpful content I have ever seen. It was an ask that went something like this, “To help make things a little easier – and noting that therapy is a luxury – ask some who are seeing a therapist (or virtually seeing) to spread the wealth and share their best tips.” Here are a couple that I felt were pure gold:

  • “Do you have to sink or swim? What if you just float?” (My fav!)
  • “Capture mood logs” (Journaling is a proven good idea to help process thoughts and experiences.)
  • “Lean into being uncomfortable. Fighting it is like fighting a wave in the ocean, you’ll end up exhausted and possibly feel worse.”
  • “Give equal space to the thought of ‘what if it all works out?'”
  • “Recognize that the whole world is grieving. You can’t expect to be the most productive you’ve ever been just because you have more free time. Everything about your life has drastically changed, be easy on yourself.”

So much good here and such a marvelous tie in to “shake it off.”

I know like me, many of you are doing your best to pray, to “call in” the positive energy and to advance our thinking so that we can come up with better approaches and solutions to dealing with this change. We are all in this together, so by all means, please share any wisdom you may find useful with other readers.

Depending on where you read this it may look like there are only a few readers, there are actually quite a few. In February there were 3,014 people reached through the blog with 550 engaging in some way. My goal with each post is for it to impact one person, and sometimes that person may only be myself, but still I forge ahead knowing this is what God has called me to do.

I share that with the ask that you share your thoughts early and often so that we can collectively share insights that can together shift our world to the positive. So much light to share and we need everyone on board!

So much love for you all!

Use your words (to love well)

“Use your words.” An extremely-patient friend of mine was trying to teach me how to clip into and out of my bike, and was walking me through the basic steps. Lucky her…. said no one. I am a challenging student when the topic may include a hard fall. After a few attempts & recognizing my increasing frustration, she shared with me this basic truth: “use your words.”

My recollection is that there were 3 things I needed to do, “unclip, slow down, stop.” Say it out loud… practice … repeat … The order is really important in this situation. I’m a difficult student however ... that and I am lacking of any desire to have skinned elbows and knees at this age. Then enters on the scene what was impactful & powerful advice: “Use your words.” This simple phrase stuck with me and I gradually improved. The idea resonated and seemed to be applicable for many areas of life. Imagine if we all could use this thought with the end goal of developing healthy relationships? How might the world improve if we encouraged loving and candid conversations? Why had I not honed in on this phrase before? (It sure may have been useful when the boys were younger.)

Here’s the question I ask to frame this up for myself: What is the most loving thing to do or say in this situation? In every conversation, be it work, home, or some other relationships, using your words and sharing your heart is often the most loving/compassionate thing you can do. If you don’t, you run the risk of not fostering healthy relationships and likely even causing that uncomfortable tension that happens when we don’t fully share what is stirring in our soul.

This feels timely right now, while many are finding themselves at home in close quarters with loved ones. Our normal patterns have been disrupted, and our anxiety ebbs and flows. This might put us in a position to think through the healthiest and most thoughtful way to share what’s on our heart. Here are a few possible scenarios:

  • Claiming ground rules and boundaries. (Yeah, we still need to clean up after we cook in the kitchen.)
  • Sharing that you are really scared, that you don’t know how you are going to come out of this financially, physically, mentally or emotionally.
  • Telling a co-worker that you need them to communicate better for the greater good of the team even though you know they are feeling stressed.

I’m sure you can come up with several other useful scenarios. I locked in on this topic early in the week. I had never heard anyone else share this truth of “using your words.” I have however always found that the universe has a way of validating if we are on the right track. Just yesterday, one of my favorite blog follows, theartofsimple.net, shared a few poems and one was titled “Use your words.” I love it.

I hope that this insight offers some encouragement and useful thoughts as you embark on another week. Let’s all choose to use our words and LOVE WELL!

What do you need today?

So, what do you need today?

What would absolutely brighten your day? Fill your soul? Lighten your load? Spark a fire? Ignite your creativity?

Now, what would it take to go make it happen?

Spring is all about fresh life, hope and joy. Our life is ours to create, to curate, and to actually live – abundantly!

Sounds easy, right? Maybe for some. But in case you are like me and struggle with this at first, I want to share a mind-mapping exercise I use to make this happen each year.

I start by putting each of my life’s main categories (finance, career, family, spiritual etc.) on paper. Then, I develop 2-3 key action items for each one of them to ensure I achieve my personal goals or dreams.

My new addition to this exercise is asking: Where can I add joy – or, what would brighten my days – in each area? For example, instead of “spend more time with my family,” perhaps I could expand that to “embark on a Saturday road trip with my sister by the end of May.” (Assuming it’s safe!)

I’d love to hear your ideas!

Here’s to a great week and the best spring ever – let’s make it so!

Train your attention on what is beautiful

So… what is beautiful to you?

  • Mountaintops
  • A child’s belly laugh
  • Flowing streams
  • A trail bike ride, meandering amongst nature with your best friends
  • A fireside chat (along with s’mores, of course)
  • The morning sun rolling in
  • The aroma of a fresh cup of coffee
  • A blue bird meditating on your deck
  • The arts – music, an amazing painting, a well-written movie…

So many options.

Today more than ever, it seems like an ideal time to focus our energies on training our minds to hone in on the beauty we are surrounded with. The noise seems to be ever increasing, trying desperately to take us off course.

Mindfulness, meditation… both have been culturally relevant words that have been making their ways into our communication streams in the last few years. I personally think it’s time to take notice if you haven’t already on this push for us to literally train our minds. It requires intentional effort and fortunately for us there are so many great resources. The best for me is silence and a good book and in a perfect world sitting on a lakeside dock. I’m also a fan of the Calm app and Peloton’s meditation options. Others do puzzles, crosswords, etc. 

It would be great to hear some of your ideas! Chime in below if you have time.

Revel in it all!

I so love this idea: REVEL IN IT. Although “revel” in itself means to celebrate in a “lively” way, to me it doesn’t necessarily have to be about being lively, but rather in living out the full expression of joy or pleasure in something.

Think about that for a minute. What does it look like to find true pleasure in life? With all of it’s twists and turns, like a roller coaster… at times exhilarating – think celebrating big moments, new babies, new jobs, new homes, a big win at work, a friend that made your day with an act of kindness, a gift of a genuine compliment – and at times a stomach-churning dip – think of all that yucky stuff that can disarm you, like a virus sticking around too long, heartbreak, or a bad decision. Generally, most get off of the ride with a big ole’ smile and a certain energy. Perhaps you’re happy you endured and didn’t puke (sorry, but let’s be real!). Or maybe you really felt the fun and scary come together for a great experience.

I’m not sure if the roller coaster analogy works for everyone, but the key point is that life should be revered, and reveling in all it has to offer is a choice. The alternative, of course, is to be a cynic and find the opposite of pleasure – pain, anguish, suffering, torment. (Ouch!) When you lay it out like that, it seems obvious that reveling is not just important, but necessary for our mental health game, which eventually translates into our physical health.

Today, I hope you will take stock of life’s many gifts, even those that aren’t what you would have chosen. Together, they unite to create lives that are worthy and purposeful and create the fabric of JOY that makes it all beautiful.